A friend asked me last week, "How's retirement?" Then he follwed that with one of those probing questions that only those who really love you would dare to ask, "Are you OK- in HERE?" (He pointed to his heart.) I knew what he was asking: "Are you feeling good about your decision? Do you have any regrets? From the inside out, is this retirement thing a good thing for you?"
My instant answer was "yes." But then I thought. And thought some more. And some more. Those kinds of loving questions do that to you. In fact, I've thought about that question (and my answer) for a week now. It was the right answer. But I needed to examine why. And I have. And the reason this retirement thing is such a good fit for me is summed up in one word: presence. Presence has always been a big word for me. I've preached it. Taught it. Lectured on it. Done seminars about it. "Whereever you are, be there!" That's my most famous line. Be in the moment.
And I think Joan and my family would tell you that I've done a fairly good job at it most of the time- but only because I've worked awfully hard at it. I, by nature, am one of those "cross all your t's and dot all your i's" kind of guys. And the problem is, I've devoted half a century to three professions (teaching, preaching, and counseling) that share one common reality: the t's are never all crossed and the i's are never all dotted. That makes it very hard for a guy like me to be present- to enjoy the moment. To savor this breath, this day, this hour. Until now.
In recent weeks, when I've watched grandaughters cheer, I've really been there. When I've tossed a ball to grandkids in the backyard, I've savored the moment. When I've watched grandkids play their various sporting events or participate in their school programs, my mind has been nowhere else but there. For perhaps the first time in my adult life, I have genuinely been present. I never realized how absent I had been all those years until I experienced what genuine presence feels like at the core of one's being. Wow!!
Now, the aim of this blog is NOT to encourage you to hurry up and retire so you can enjoy genuine presence. I'm attempting to say to you: don't make the mistake I made. Don't wait until retirement before you allow yourself to truly let go and relish each moment deep down in your soul. Yes, retirement works well for me. Presence makes all the difference. It always will. And you don't have to retire to realize it.
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
Joan just reminded me of an interesting irony. January 22 is the anniversary of Roe vs. Wade. How ironic! Let me provide the back story:
In early 1974, Joan and I were in the office of the obstetrician who had attended her during the pregnancies with Jim and Laurie. Upon discovery of Joan being pregnant again, he offered to set up an appointment for us with a local abortionist: "This over-populated world of ours needs every family to realize that two children is enough for any set of parents to bring into an already over-crowded world." Those were his words that hung in the air long after we had run from his office with lightning speed, seeking a Christian obstetrician, Dr. William Scheihing, to assist us in welcoming into the world our daughter, Lisa on October 17th of that year.
January 22nd. Do you get the irony? You do if you've been following our family on Facebook today. On January 22, 2000, exactly thirteen years ago today, I stood at the back of a church building prepared to walk our daughter down the aisle to marry the love of her life, Chris Phillips. She was about to walk into a life of becoming an adoring wife, an incredible mother, an outstanding Christian woman-creative, intuitive, gregarious, enthusiastic- a blessing to all who know her. January 22nd. The very day that marked the passage of Roe vs. Wade. Our daughter whom the doctor urged us to abort- for the sake of an over-populated world. That daughter married. On January 22nd. Wow! God is full of ironies, isn't He? And we who strive to walk according to His precepts are the recipients of the blessings. Happy Anniversary, Li and Chris. Love you! Dad
In early 1974, Joan and I were in the office of the obstetrician who had attended her during the pregnancies with Jim and Laurie. Upon discovery of Joan being pregnant again, he offered to set up an appointment for us with a local abortionist: "This over-populated world of ours needs every family to realize that two children is enough for any set of parents to bring into an already over-crowded world." Those were his words that hung in the air long after we had run from his office with lightning speed, seeking a Christian obstetrician, Dr. William Scheihing, to assist us in welcoming into the world our daughter, Lisa on October 17th of that year.
January 22nd. Do you get the irony? You do if you've been following our family on Facebook today. On January 22, 2000, exactly thirteen years ago today, I stood at the back of a church building prepared to walk our daughter down the aisle to marry the love of her life, Chris Phillips. She was about to walk into a life of becoming an adoring wife, an incredible mother, an outstanding Christian woman-creative, intuitive, gregarious, enthusiastic- a blessing to all who know her. January 22nd. The very day that marked the passage of Roe vs. Wade. Our daughter whom the doctor urged us to abort- for the sake of an over-populated world. That daughter married. On January 22nd. Wow! God is full of ironies, isn't He? And we who strive to walk according to His precepts are the recipients of the blessings. Happy Anniversary, Li and Chris. Love you! Dad
Some who have known me for years as the fat preacher I have been for most of those years are becoming concerned in recent months that something must be wrong with my health because of what they describe as my "gaunt" appearance. I understand- when you've been looking at 250 pounds most of these years, 165 pounds appears "sick". But, let me put your minds at ease. To my knowledge, I am in as good of health as I've been in during my adult life. Let me tell you the back story:
In February, 2011, I weighed in for my annual physical at 258 pounds. My A1c (a measurement for diabetics, which should remain under 7.0) was 9.3. My cholseterol was high and my tryglicerides were near 600. Joan and I decided we had to do something to turn this around. But we had lost/gained SO many times throughout the years (Those who have known me know the truth of that) that we needed to decide up front what could possibly make this time different. We pledged to each other that we would engage in weekly accountability EVERY week for the remainder of our lives. For us, that's all that could possibly work. SO, we signed up (yet again!) for Weight Watchers- the program that we had come to believe is the most balanced approach to healthy weight loss. We chose the meeting where our long-time friend, Linda Steele was the lead facilitator- she is wonderful! I weighed in on April 1, 2011, at 236.4 pounds.
As I began to lose, the health benefits began to emerge. Quickly both my A1c and my triglycerides and cholesterol began showing improvement. I reached my goal weight on September 1, 2011, and have successfully maintained (for the first time in my adult life) the weight loss since- almost 17 months. I now weigh 165 pounds, give or take a pound or two. My A1c has been 5.4 each of my last three six months physicals. My blood pressure and cholesterol are so dramatically improved that my meds have been drastically lowered. My triglycerides are now 60 rather than 600. Joan and I walk a minimum of 4 miles per day (we've logged over 100 miles so far this calendar year) and are both feeling better than we have in a LONG time.
SO, AS FAR AS I KNOW, I AM NOT SICK! Quite to the contrary, my health appears to be excellent at the moment. Thank you all for your concern and for loving us enough to be concerned. I'm publishing this because I feel that if you love us enough to be that concerned, you deserve to know the story. Praise God with is- He IS good! By the way, we have not missed even one week of weighing in at WW since we started and our pledge to each other is that such will remain true the rest of our lives. Thanks for your friendship!!
In February, 2011, I weighed in for my annual physical at 258 pounds. My A1c (a measurement for diabetics, which should remain under 7.0) was 9.3. My cholseterol was high and my tryglicerides were near 600. Joan and I decided we had to do something to turn this around. But we had lost/gained SO many times throughout the years (Those who have known me know the truth of that) that we needed to decide up front what could possibly make this time different. We pledged to each other that we would engage in weekly accountability EVERY week for the remainder of our lives. For us, that's all that could possibly work. SO, we signed up (yet again!) for Weight Watchers- the program that we had come to believe is the most balanced approach to healthy weight loss. We chose the meeting where our long-time friend, Linda Steele was the lead facilitator- she is wonderful! I weighed in on April 1, 2011, at 236.4 pounds.
As I began to lose, the health benefits began to emerge. Quickly both my A1c and my triglycerides and cholesterol began showing improvement. I reached my goal weight on September 1, 2011, and have successfully maintained (for the first time in my adult life) the weight loss since- almost 17 months. I now weigh 165 pounds, give or take a pound or two. My A1c has been 5.4 each of my last three six months physicals. My blood pressure and cholesterol are so dramatically improved that my meds have been drastically lowered. My triglycerides are now 60 rather than 600. Joan and I walk a minimum of 4 miles per day (we've logged over 100 miles so far this calendar year) and are both feeling better than we have in a LONG time.
SO, AS FAR AS I KNOW, I AM NOT SICK! Quite to the contrary, my health appears to be excellent at the moment. Thank you all for your concern and for loving us enough to be concerned. I'm publishing this because I feel that if you love us enough to be that concerned, you deserve to know the story. Praise God with is- He IS good! By the way, we have not missed even one week of weighing in at WW since we started and our pledge to each other is that such will remain true the rest of our lives. Thanks for your friendship!!
Monday, January 7, 2013
I just read my favorite verse in all of Scripture. It's been my favorite for many years. Reading it again is a wonderful way to begin a new year:
"Let your character or moral disposition be free from love of money (including greed, avarice, lust, and craving for earthly possessions) and be satisfied with your present (circumstances and with what you have); for He (God) Himself has said, 'I will not in any way fail you nor give you up nor leave you without support. (I will) not, (I will) not, (I will) not in any degree leave you helpless nor forsake nor let (you) down (relax My hold on you)! (Assuredly not!) (Hebrews 13:5, Amplified)
That verse is really tied up in "nots", isn't it? And every one of them is there in the original language. Do you get the idea that God is trying (hard) to remind us of an important truth that we too often forget? No question about it: there are those times in life when it simply does not "feel" like He is anywhere near. In those times it appears as though He has most certainly deserted us. Has turned His back. Has walked away. But in this verse He reminds us that He will NOT leave us- ever. No matter what. He will not divorce us, desert us, abandon us. Most assuredly not.
So, whom do we believe at such times? The Enemy who whispers in our ear, "He's left you alone, you know- don't you feel His absence?" OR, will we listen to His promise- No matter how it's feeling at the moment, you can always count on one thing: I WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU!!"
I, for one. choose to believe the One whose promises have proven trustworthy over and over again for more than 66 years in my life. Does that mean that everything has been "hunky dory"? That every event in my life has been "peachy keen"? That my rosebushes have had no thorns? That my life has witnessed no cloudy days? NO! Life has not always been a "cakewalk". But one thing I have learned. On God's side of the cloudiest days there is sunshine. And He IS here. Always here. Even when it doesn't feel like He is. Or taste like He is. Or smell like He is. Or sound like He is. Or look like He is. He IS here! And the more deeply I believe that truth (and I believe it more deeply every day!) the more my emotions line up with my trust. He is always close enough to catch my tears in His bottle. I can't ask for more in life than that. And I praise Him-with all my heart!!
"Let your character or moral disposition be free from love of money (including greed, avarice, lust, and craving for earthly possessions) and be satisfied with your present (circumstances and with what you have); for He (God) Himself has said, 'I will not in any way fail you nor give you up nor leave you without support. (I will) not, (I will) not, (I will) not in any degree leave you helpless nor forsake nor let (you) down (relax My hold on you)! (Assuredly not!) (Hebrews 13:5, Amplified)
That verse is really tied up in "nots", isn't it? And every one of them is there in the original language. Do you get the idea that God is trying (hard) to remind us of an important truth that we too often forget? No question about it: there are those times in life when it simply does not "feel" like He is anywhere near. In those times it appears as though He has most certainly deserted us. Has turned His back. Has walked away. But in this verse He reminds us that He will NOT leave us- ever. No matter what. He will not divorce us, desert us, abandon us. Most assuredly not.
So, whom do we believe at such times? The Enemy who whispers in our ear, "He's left you alone, you know- don't you feel His absence?" OR, will we listen to His promise- No matter how it's feeling at the moment, you can always count on one thing: I WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU!!"
I, for one. choose to believe the One whose promises have proven trustworthy over and over again for more than 66 years in my life. Does that mean that everything has been "hunky dory"? That every event in my life has been "peachy keen"? That my rosebushes have had no thorns? That my life has witnessed no cloudy days? NO! Life has not always been a "cakewalk". But one thing I have learned. On God's side of the cloudiest days there is sunshine. And He IS here. Always here. Even when it doesn't feel like He is. Or taste like He is. Or smell like He is. Or sound like He is. Or look like He is. He IS here! And the more deeply I believe that truth (and I believe it more deeply every day!) the more my emotions line up with my trust. He is always close enough to catch my tears in His bottle. I can't ask for more in life than that. And I praise Him-with all my heart!!
Wednesday, January 2, 2013
When I was a young minister, I blushed so badly to say three particular words that I would do almost anything not to have to say them. Now, at sixty-six, I can say them readily without so much as a hint of a blush.
I thought of those words today as I prepared my lesson for the retirees at Meadowlakes tonight. We're studying the story where Samuel does exactly what Saul will do several chapters later- offer a sacrifice to God that only the priests of Levi were supposed to offer. Saul ultimately lost his kingdom over that one. Samuel does not receive so much as a reprimand- in fact, he receives a resounding victory in battle against the Philistines. Immediately, the three words rushed to mind. And this time, I didn't blush. The three words: I DON'T KNOW! No, I really do know what the three words are- you just heard them- "I don't know". As a young minister, I thought to not know was a sin. After all, doesn't Peter encourage us to always have the answer to anyone who might ask us a question? No, he actually doesn't say that. Read the remainder of the sentence: "to anyone who asks you concerning the hope that lies within you". Now, I can do that. It's the having an answer for everyone's every question that I haven't mastered yet. But, praise God, that's part of my answer for the hope that lies within me- I am not God and I no longer have to pretend that I am. He has all the answers. I don't. That's ok. It's better than ok- it's amazing!
I don't know why Samuel got the victory and Saul got the boot. If I were pressed to guess, I would think that it might have had something to do with the heart of each man. Maybe Samuel really did have God and God's people as his primary focus. Maybe Saul was thinking about Saul- his reputation, his victory. But the bottom line is: I don't know (I'm not blushing!) I can't read hearts. I can't assume motivations. That's why I'm not judge. That's why He is. I'm glad. It's such a relief to be able to say those three words without a blush. Thank you, Jesus! YOU are THE reason for the hope that lies within me. All I need to know is YOU!!
I thought of those words today as I prepared my lesson for the retirees at Meadowlakes tonight. We're studying the story where Samuel does exactly what Saul will do several chapters later- offer a sacrifice to God that only the priests of Levi were supposed to offer. Saul ultimately lost his kingdom over that one. Samuel does not receive so much as a reprimand- in fact, he receives a resounding victory in battle against the Philistines. Immediately, the three words rushed to mind. And this time, I didn't blush. The three words: I DON'T KNOW! No, I really do know what the three words are- you just heard them- "I don't know". As a young minister, I thought to not know was a sin. After all, doesn't Peter encourage us to always have the answer to anyone who might ask us a question? No, he actually doesn't say that. Read the remainder of the sentence: "to anyone who asks you concerning the hope that lies within you". Now, I can do that. It's the having an answer for everyone's every question that I haven't mastered yet. But, praise God, that's part of my answer for the hope that lies within me- I am not God and I no longer have to pretend that I am. He has all the answers. I don't. That's ok. It's better than ok- it's amazing!
I don't know why Samuel got the victory and Saul got the boot. If I were pressed to guess, I would think that it might have had something to do with the heart of each man. Maybe Samuel really did have God and God's people as his primary focus. Maybe Saul was thinking about Saul- his reputation, his victory. But the bottom line is: I don't know (I'm not blushing!) I can't read hearts. I can't assume motivations. That's why I'm not judge. That's why He is. I'm glad. It's such a relief to be able to say those three words without a blush. Thank you, Jesus! YOU are THE reason for the hope that lies within me. All I need to know is YOU!!
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
Yesterday
Eight grandchildren filled our walls with laughter yesterday. Amazing! Three remain with us this morning as their mom and dad are returning today from celebrating their 20th anniversary in San Francisco. Solomon knew what he was talking about (Duh!), grandchildren really ARE the crowning glory of growing old. Joan and I feel SO blessed! Caden's quiet wisdom. Corban's committed heart. Cooper's enterprising spirit. Marlee's exuberant nature. Riley's kind heart. Carson's tender strength. Carter's determined spirit. Reese's ever-busy productivity. Each unique. Each designed by God with meaning and purpose. Each given hope for their future. Each nurtured by families who choose to wait upon the Lord. Each empowered by Eagles' wings which results from such waiting. None weighed down by worry. None forced to grow up too early as SO many in our culture are forced to do. Allowed to be kids. (Thank you, Jesus!) Thank you for all those yesterdays of colic-filled nights and messy diapers; for skinned knees and warm hugs; for tears to dry away and laughter to overflow our walls; for newborns whose heads nestled against our chests on those cold winter's nights and for adolescents whose various commitments have warmed our spring and summer days. And, thank you for the hope of tomorrow: for graduations to attend (the first arriving in 2014); for weddings to celebrate, for great-grandkids to cuddle against our chest on those truly cold nights in the winter of our lives. Thank you, Lord for yesterday. And, especially, thank You for the hope of tomorrow!
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)